A bit of comic relief

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This blog has been a bit serious lately and I am not a very serious person. So I decided to lighten things up just a bit. Below is an old post I am bring back to life because 1. there is no time to write a new post and 2. lots of us are dealing with big things and I want you to find joy in the fact that at least these things have not happened to you.

You know….I think something is wrong with me. I can teach my children how to read, add, subtract and write but I can not think clearly. And when I do think clearly, my actions want to keep me humble and I go and fall or break something. Here are a few examples.

About a year ago an environmentalist lady came to my door in hopes of getting me to donate a few dimes toward lobbying against mines at the bottom of Mount St. Helens. She did a fabulous job of explaining how bad this would be for the environment and how it would contaminate the water. She continued to convey how this would be really bad for the hikers, dogs and those who ride horses along the trails. I was growing more and more tense (no, not because this took 10 mins and my children were painting themselves and the bathroom mirror with toothpaste) but because I was truly concerned and horrified this was something our government would sanction. So I desperately said to the lady,”Doesn’t the UN have laws against this? I don’t know why you would be so concerned about contaminated water when people will be losing arms and legs and horses will be exploding!!!” She looked at me. Her face was blank. She then said with pressed lips, “Mines….like for minerals. Not LAND MINES!!” She quickly walked off my porch. I stood pondering my misunderstanding.

Another example is the time I walked into Safeway to grab a loaf of bread and I thought someone had snuck up behind me. I screamed and fell backwards onto the floor only to realize that I had walked and gotten tangled in a bunch of balloons. It took two people and an army knife to free me.

And then there is the time I hit the fire alarm in a hotel thinking it was the button to start the bubbles in the hot tub.

Perhaps, the worst was meeting my in-laws. The first time I met them was one Thanksgiving. We lived in Colorado Springs and there had been enough snow to delay their flight home. So I volunteered to take Jan (my mother-in-law) and Becky (Trev’s aunt) and Jory (Trev’s middle Brother) to the Broadmoor. This hotel is a 5 star resort. It is nestled in the foothills of the Rocky mountains and is absolutely gorgeous! The day after Thanksgiving they had an ice sculpture exhibit surrounding the pond behind the resort. We went and were getting to know each other. It was akward. We came to a life size sculpture of Santa and 8 life size reindeer. It was magnificent. So knowing that Jan loved to take pictures, I suggested that Jory and I climb up in the sleigh for a picture. We climbed up and all seemed to be fine until I grabbed the velvet rope connected to all the reindeer. As soon as I did this 8 life size reindeer came crashing to the ground. It sounded like a chandelier had fallen!! In a panic we all started to run toward the hotel…”Into the gift shop!” yells Jan. “Oh sure! No one will think to look there!” I said sarcastically. The four of us ran and hid in a corner with a grand piano in front of it. All laughing and out of breath, Jan looks at me and says, “Well, you’ve got no where to go but up!!” Thus began a wonderful relationship!

This is not a complete list by any means. So today when you are down and distressed..remember no matter what happens, you can take comfort in and celebrate knowing …..YOU AREN”T ME!! If you have any moments like the above…I would love to hear them. More laughter is always needed.

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